Blasphemy

Picture this.

God loves us.  He loves us so much that He sent his one and only son to come and die for us.  And Jesus loved us enough to do that too.  Our Father is the very definition of Love and He sets the standard for what Love should be.  So I don’t understand when people say ‘I feel like God doesn’t care sometimes.’

Because…How could God NOT care?

He cares more and in greater ways than we will every comprehend.

That’s why I get so pissed.

For someone who understands our pain better than we could understand it ourselves… FUCK.

See, God knows what it’s like to watch someone whom He loves to be in pain.  Am I talking about Jesus?  No.  I’m talking about the whole fucking world.  He loves every. single. one. of. us.  If we were grains of sand on a shore, He’d pick up every single one of us and polish us.  So His love is UNDENIABLE.  He KNOWS MUCH BETTER than all of us what it’s like to SUFFER from Love.

Or better yet… lose someone that we love.

And that’s why I’m so pissed.

For someone who understands so well… He sure is hands-off about the whole fucking situation.

Sometimes I think our God is the most loving being on this earth.  

Other times I think He is the coldest and cruelest being that I know.

The rest of the time, I want to just fucking cry.

Fuck.

Life is real everyday.

And I keep forgetting.

FUCK.

Fuck everything.  Seriously.

Anonymous asked
Do you miss me?

Wow… I kind of did.  

I think I got attached to your gray face and sunglasses.

But really… I did.  You’re kind of endearing in a creepy kind of way…

Watched a Movie with my Roommates today…

Just the four of us.

And for those 2 hours it was like we were freshman again and nothing had ever happened between the four of us.

It was nice.

Its all about following the crumbs left behind…

God I am such a chicken.

훗.  좋은 날이군.  

아~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~주 좋은 날이야.

뭐… 

예쁜건 인정?

Broke my Lent two days in a row…

Everyone has something that they’re ashamed of.

And everyone has something that they want to hide.

You don’t necessarily have to wonder how to help when you hear those things.

You can just listen.

Let’s say I had two dogs.  I love them both equally.  

One day when I was taking a walk by the river both of them fell into the water.  Unfortunately this so called river leads to a waterfall.  I only have time to save one of them before the calm river will become a living torrent of raging H2O.  

You see, there’s a lesson I learned here.  

If I hesitate I lose both of them.  But if I make up my mind fast and choose one… I can save one of them.

So…

Fuck Physics.  I’m going to just study Orgo for the rest of the night.

Sigh.

I have to keep aware of my own surroundings more.

Just because I only have 2 friends at church doesn’t mean I have to unintentionally insult other people to keep it that way…

QT Now, League Later…

Or League Now or QT Later….

내 친구들은 예수를 위해서 목숨을 거는대…

나는 여기서 쓸대없는것만 하고있다.

I think I know what I’m giving up for Lent.

사람들은 서로를 알아가고 이해하기위해 온인생을 투자한다.

하지만 조금만더 뒤돌아보고….
조금만더 꽉쥐던 욕심으로 가득찬 주먹들을 벌리고…

조금만더 나의 만족을위해 하는 착함을 멈추고…
조금만더 희생을하면 어떨까?…

그렇게 해도 될까말까이다.

진짜 인생 좆같다.